I often wonder what life would be like if I was never put on psychiatric meds. I was first put on Zoloft and Adderall as a young kid, then taken off of both at some point and put on Lexapro and Wellbuterin. I also was never diagnosed with ADHD. Just "executive functioning" issues and who the ef knows what that really means. Then I was put on different meds. I have been on the highest dose of Lexapro for well over a decade. Wellbutrin has been added in on and off over the years as well. I guess they maybe take the edge off? But I don't even remember what I felt like without them. I often wonder if the side effects out weigh the benefits. Sometimes I wonder if they are actually making me feel worse. I don't know if it's even possible to stop taking them. Psychiatrist doesn't recommend it. Part of mte is scared that I will actually get a lot worse, but most of me is scared that I will get better and have to deal with the crushing reality that this suffering was all preventable. - Human, 30 y/o
